So Happy

The boy isn't all that expressive with his emotions; he's never particularly liked to be touched (unless its on his terms) nor has he ever been very generous with his hugs and kisses.

Much to our parental delight, that started to change recently.  The boy began to verbally express his feelings.  I remember the first time, It was morning and he'd been playing in his room for about 20 minutes.  The moment I opened his bedroom door he ran to me, gave me a huge hug and exclaimed that he was 'so happy'.

In that moment, my heart melted and continues to melt, each and every time he tells me that he's so happy.

For the hubs and I, those two words are practically an addiction, like crack for parents.  Every time we open his bedroom door we silently hope that the onslaught of love from our little man is there waiting for us.  Of course its not, because if it was, it would become commonplace far too fast.

Despite our efforts, those two words will not be tricked or coerced out of him, we simply must wait for his moments of joy and revel in the love that our little man chooses to share with us.

When he's so happy, its infectious, we are too.

Does cleanliness equal happiness?

I recently had a playdate with a coworker, also on maternity leave with her second son, and was in complete and utter awe of her home.  Although I love our townhouse, she has a beautiful old house in a very trendy part of town and if that wasn't enough, he home was super clean and tidy.  Except for the small play area in the kitchen you would barely know that she was the mother of two lovely boys aged 7 and 25 months; there were no toys strewn everywhere, no random blankets adorning every chair in the house, no random little boy socks peeking out of the couch cushions and definitely no potential death traps (i.e. toys) underfoot.

When I voiced my admiration of her impeccable domestic skills, I was surprised by her response.

"Thanks, but I would be so much happier if I could just let it go."

She went on to explain that her need to have things in just the right place, takes up immeasurable amounts of her time and energy and that if she could just 'live with a little mess' she would.  I admit I have the opposite problem, I am not a slob of disgusting proportions, but I have a tendency to kick toys out of the way, leave clothes in the dryer for days at a time, avoid the vacuum like the plague and only do the dishes once a day.

I make up for my domestic downfalls with my ability to cook, love and nurture and I know that cleanliness isn't everything, but I also know that the hubs would die to have a house where everything had a home AND was actually put away all the time.  That said, my friends comment got me thinking, would he (or we for that matter) really be happier if our house was perfect and tidy. 

How does cleanliness really play into the happiness equation?

How would the happiness gained by finding everything in mere moments be balanced by the time, energy and anxiety of maintaining that 'perfection'?  I don't really know the answer, but I'm pretty sure I'd be miserable if  I spent all my time trying to keep my house tidy; when would I have time to take photographs of my children, blog, tweet, sew and relax?

When I asked the Momma Stuff Blog Facebook Fans what their least favourite chore was, I couldn't help but giggle.  Like those other momma's folding laundry, unloading the dishwasher and vacuuming are all on my 'dislike' list, but things like dusting and washing windows aren't even on my radar.  Does that make me a bad wife?

I think not, but what do you think?

50 Things That Make Me Happy

When I was in College I was in a program for Environmental Studies; this meant my classes and electives were all derived from a pre-determined list of courses.  The certainty I had in choosing my post-secondary direction was good in that I was able to accomplish a Diploma as well as a BSc with a major and a minor in only 5 years, but I also lost out on some of the "funner" electives that everyone else was taking.  Classes like Sociology and Psychology, just weren't available to me; sometimes I wish I had taken an extra semester and had the chance to explore some of those options.  In truth however, I'm fairly certain they wouldn't have changed my career path and would have just prolonged my post-secondary education, which I was more than FINISHED with at the end of my five years.

One elective I was forced to take was philosophy.  In theory it seemed like something I would like; this particular class was about expressing your opinion and owning that opinion.  In fact we got marks for wearing a nametag each day (to show you stood behind your comments) and for having a neatly organized duotang, which the teacher would spot check each week.  Ok the latter was just stupid, but its truly one of the only things I remember from the class.

Actually I think that aside from the nametags and duotangs, the only thing I remember is the "50 things that make you happy" assignment.  When giving us the assignment, the professor actually pulled this worn piece of paper from his wallet; his 50 things that made him happy.  It seemed a little stupid at the time, and it seemed like such a simple task, but 50 is a pretty big number and it took some thought to think up 50 things that truly made me happy.  And as much as I hated to admit it, when I was having a bad day, I could look at that list and it almost instantly made me smile.

I lost THAT list a long time ago, but I think its time for a new one.  I urge you all to consider making your own list, and if you blog, post it and link it back here, it is seriously amazing to have a smile in your back pocket. Try not to read back through, change and/or judge your list.  Just sit down, write out the list and post it (easier said than done I know).  Somehow that makes it more authentic; no self-judgment allowed.

50 Things That Make Me Happy

(in no particular order)

1. The boy.
2. The Hubs.
3. Sunshine.
4. My family.
5. Big, authentic hugs.
6. Doing something altruistic for others.
7. The smell of rain in the forest.
8. A beautiful moment, captured on film.
9. Positive comments on my blog.
10. Taking actions to benefit the environment.
11. The boys' laughter.
12. The boys' smiles.
13. The boys' hugs and gooby kisses.
14. When the hubs strokes my hair and kisses my forehead.
15. Driving on the highway, on a sunny day, with the windows open and the music blaring.
16. Working in the garden.
17. A hot bath after a long day.
18. Watching things grow.
19. Cuddles from my cats.
20. Catching the people that I love in moments of happiness.
21. Listening to rain beating down on a tarp.
22. Dipping my feet into water (lake/ocean).
23. Eating food from street vendors.
24. Cooking for other people.
25. Watching people enjoy the food that I cook.
26. Baking cookies.
27. Curiosity in the boys' eyes.
28. Watching children play.
29. Being good at my job.
30. Learning something new.
31. Intimacy.
32. Playing softball with good friends.
33. Making a great play and getting the out (at softball).
34. Getting a solid hit (in softball) and moving the runners around.
35. Going for a walk.
36. Being Canadian.
37. Singing along to music when no one is listening.
38. Being a mom.
39. Being a daughter.
40. Being a sister.
41. Taking care of family - when they need it.
42. Reading a good book.
43. Being surrounded by nature.
44. A good discussion with a friend I don't see near enough.
45. My friends' and family's happiness.
46. Observing authentic love.
47. Finding a good sale on something I want.
48. Being outside.
49. Sharing my experiences with others.
50. Creating something with my own hands.

What makes you happy?
I'd love to hear 5 things that make YOU happy!