Change

Blue skies and powdery snow,

My children smile as the wind blows.

Get outside, enjoy the sun,

Be free, my boys, find your fun.

Smell the trees, touch the sky,

Take time to dream and learn to fly.

Just now our steps are small,

Gingerly we tread, for fear we may fall.

But hope is our mantra and change is our friend,

This road that we follow, we’re travelling a bend.

Each day’s an adventure, something new to behold,

Our hearts brim with excitement, in spite of the cold.

I can’t help but wonder what tomorrow will bring,

When the grass turns green and we experience the Spring.

And so, it begins

It’s almost 9am on Sunday morning and I’m still in my Pyjamas, drinking coffee and listening to Adele. There are no cartoons on the TV, no one vying for my attention, I hear no screaming and there are no tears in sight. It’s peaceful and after four and a half years of parenthood, it feels completely foreign.

Is this what it’s like to be single?

I had a cookie with my breakfast, and I didn’t have to hide it from anybody. I slept until 8am without guilt, and I’m planning to nap later. Today’s plans include trying to find a solution for the lack of wifi in my apartment (seriously!), picking up some essentials for the apartment and perhaps going for a little run, but it sure looks cold out there, so we will see.

I only arrived in Kamloops yesterday afternoon and although I’m embracing this ‘single life’ without my boys, I miss them like crazy.

This peaceful morning feels empty without all the snuggles and cuddles and kisses that come along with the tears and frustration of children and the warm embrace of my husband. I’m not sure how I’m going to survive the next 5 days without them and worse, I’m not sure how I’m going to continue to repeat the cycle of being without them 4 days a week for the next month or so.

I believe life is about the journey and THIS is the start of our family’s adventure; we just have to take it a day a time and before we know it we WILL have found our balance.